literature

Silver Circle

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Literature Text

There on an open part of the wide
And bending river bank,
Sits a girl.
Harbouring burdens unseen to the naked eye,
She watches darkness fall around her,
Staring to the sky above,
She cries.
Transfixed by the lapping water beside her,
Pensive, contemplating the swirling mercury before her.
Into the depths she casts a stone,
Hoping that with it will sink her fears and problems.
To her side stands a proud tree,
Its branches entwined with a beautiful memory.
On its bark, a proclamation which will echo through the ages.
On the far bank, two swans flutter their wings,
Portraying a symbol of unity for which she longs.
Evoking powerful emotions, from her finger she takes a ring,
The sparkle of its jewel has faded.
She rolls it in her palm,
Remembering the precious moment it holds.
Wanting to throw it, like she had done the stone,
Softly she sobs, torn in two.
Across the rolling fields, the horizon she watches.
The vivid colors, seeping through the clouds.
She ponders upon his smile and stays,
'Til the sun has fallen, leaving her to the stars,
To dream of something that will never be.
Yeah so I am trying to write more free verse poems and this is what I came up with. See if you can catch the message/story to it...it's pretty simple...Peter got it right away, yay for him! So yep...I would like constructive criticism on this one please!! I'm trying to make my free verse poems better.
© 2006 - 2024 sweetgirl4022
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krystalluseopia's avatar
That pretty much describes a couple months of my life, lol. But an excellent poem, nonetheless! I liked the descriptions/ similes and metaphors. I also thought the meter was a little off in some stanzas, but this is one of my favorites!